WOMM - 2-02-03

Hey everyone. I'm getting so tired lately I can't even update. I have been updating and making a new site, as well as getting info for it, which has been the topic of this week. For those of you that skate and aren't posers, its salvationsk8.com. Its the new Baytown Skate Park. All I have to say is, I don't give a shit who goes there, poser or not, because, basically, the more money that they get, the better chance Jared and I will get a good payment and love in return for making that site.

I don't really have any topics on this WOMM. Well, I know I have one, so let me start off. Oh, the last WOMM wasn't even funny, so I mean, I didn't say it. And, when I did, I messed up mixing it.

AP

Basically, this is what's going on. TW has started to declare war on things a whole lot because well, its just the right thing to do. Not only have we all been put up with enough shit this year, but its just getting worse and worse.

First off, I would just like to make one thing clear: AP classes do NOT mean college classes. If they were college classes, we would be getting college credit no matter if we took the test or not. In college, you don't have to take an AP test. You just take the final. When you pass the final, you pass the class. You don't have to take some bullshit test that has to go through the entire year.

With that said, when the Academic Dean tells me "Your teacher doesn't have to even teach you since its an AP class. That's how many teachers teach in college" we should all just riot and never go to school again. I'm attending a HIGH SCHOOL. I'm taking History AP, Music Theory AP, and English AP because I want a better gradepoint and I hate stupid people in stupid classes, because all they do is fuck around with the teacher and don't do any of their work..wait...wait...that sounds like what I do. Ok, better fucking definition: Its a class full of people with IQ's smaller then Asian penis size - so basically, if 3 inches translated into IQ, it would be like, 10. Their IQ is TEN!! ALL OF THEM!! FUCK CLASSES THAT AREN'T PRE-AP OR AP CAUSE EVERYONE IN THE OTHER CLASSES ARE DUMB!! DUMB!!!!

P.S. No offense to people in those classes.

Ok, back to topic. Now, I'm in AP classes, but I'm not in college. Therefore, using the substitution property of Geometry which I learned from a very loud and obnoxious Geometry teacher, AP classes = College Material; High School != (does not equal) College; AP Classes = College; AP Classes = Gay. Therefore, in one huge summary: High School == Gay == AP classes == Gay == Rachel Barajas. UH OH!!

OK, so I'm still not done with this entire proving the entire point that teachers should teach us ALWAYS if we're in high school. First off, if there was any place where we SHOULD be taught, don't you think it would be college? I mean, you pay like $84,250,611 dollars to like touch a professor's penis in college, and that's not all: Its another $500,000,000 to get taught! I mean, these professors are getting all this money, and they don't teach? WHAT THE @#$%! (make up your cuss word there!)

So, this is what I'm protesting. Although I'm not really on the best of terms with my band director, he teaches our class (Music Theory). I love Mrs. Stanley more then anything because she teaches us and she's absolutely hilarious and she said "God damn it" in front of me accidently but that doesn't make her awesome its her being awesome by herself and damn it I have no idea how to finish this sentence so I'll just bow.

But anyway, what I'm trying to say is - if our teacher in HIGH SCHOOL does not teach us even though we are in an AP class - I'M LOSING HIGH SCHOOL CREDIT AS WELL! MY PARENTS PAY TAXES YOU SHITTY BITCHES! YOU BETTER TEACH US! OR IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TEACH US, JUST GIVE US 100'S, CAUSE THAT'D BE REALLY GREAT AND SEXY! IF YOU'RE GOING TO NOT TEACH US AND FAIL US AND SIT ON YOUR LAZY ASS, THEN YOU SHOULD JOIN THE GAY AND LESBIAN PHONEBOOK WITH RACHEL BARAJAS AND KELLY KINCL!!

Speaking of all of this, many of you have tried to get me to declare TW war on AP History, but to be honest, Mrs. May tries. What I should declare war on is Mrs. May just getting pregnant and staying in school. I think that when a teacher gets pregnant, they should just stay home and do nothing. NOTHING! I hate pregnant people, I hate them more than fat people. Fat people and pregnant people should just like move to Arkansas with the incest loving people. Arkansas should just be the state for people who SUCK. I mean, who really wants to claim their from Arkansas? The Clintons? That's it! No one else says, "HEY, I'M FROM ARKANSAS, I LOVE WHERE I'M FROM!!"

(ReLBadboy15: ok dude, what if there was a pregnant lady, and she just ate lots of sour cream, would that be ok?) LOLOLOLOLOL

What about Wyoming? Have any of you met someone from Wyoming? What are they like? Do they like to eat babies? I don't even know the capital of Wyoming. I think its like Cheyenne or something, but I don't know how to spell Indian names cause Indians piss me off in the first place. Stop complaining about losing your land, cause all of us don't care.

I have no idea how I'm now talking about Wyoming when I was talking about AP classes and my Academic Dean, but, altogether, this column, using the substituion property would be: AP classes == Gay == Fat People == People who enjoy incest == Arkansas == Wyoming == Rachel Barajas. "I've known you for three seconds and i'm already bored." - SNL

Shuttle

First off, I would like to send TW's condolences to the families who lost loved ones in the space shuttle accident Saturday Morning.

Second off, I would like to get anyone on a shooting range AND SHOOT THEM 84 FUCKING TIMES who thought even for a SECOND that terrorists were the cause of this TRAGIC ACCIDENT!

When I saw the accident, I immediately was reminded by the Challenger accident (if you don't know what that is, just jump off the Fred Hartman Bridge because you are a MORON) and read to see what happened. Not ONCE did in my mind terrorism come to play. Just because a Jew and some Americans get together to have sex in space DOES NOT mean terroists want to blow up the world.

All I basically want to make all of you know is, and if you don't agree, you're just so stupid you need to go on that shooting range. If anything in America blows up in the next ten years, if your first solution to the problem is that its terrorism, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT. The other day, some pharamacutical plant was burning down in North Carolina. Not terrorism. Flight whatever that crashed in the Rockaways in New York - not terrorism. Sniper rifle - not terrorism. Well, it sort of is, but not like Al Qaida or anything.

Anyway, back to the topic of the shuttle. If any of you are interested, Yahoo! is having full coverage of it, so just type www.yahoo.com and set it as your home page cause there's not a better homepage in the world than that. Well, Nick has TW as his home page, or did at least, and I thought that was dead sexy.

February 2nd Massacre

Today marks one year of the massacre in which I shut down TW for several hours trying to recap on what happened to myself in the earlier morning. Many of you remember what happened and I don't want to bring it up, but I remember dates really well. If you'd like to read about it, go to 2002 Part 1 history.

With this new February 2nd coming in, much controversy has set. My statement a week ago with the speech of Warzastan and the comment "many of us are now in cliques of best friends, two or three, and we usually don't come together unless its some miraculous moment" is starting to become apparent and come true.

World War IV has started, and I don't know if it will ever end. Message to the contributors of war: FUCK YOU.

Baytown

For the last like, hour or so, I've been reading a lot about Baytown history. Slap me across the face. One of the most "fascinating" things I've read so far is the fact that the Exxon refinery was once called the "Humble Refinery." Well, guess who founded that refinery? Ross S. Sterling. Pretty weird, that everyone in the entire United States knows what Exxon is, but none of them can answer the question: What high school does the future communist leader of the United States currently attend and was named after the founder of Exxon called?

Nick, do you know the road you buy your porn on, McKinney, was named after the last signer of the Texas Declaration of Independence?? Dude, that's awesome! McKinney must have been a ladies man!

Horace Mann was once the "colored" school of Pelly (one of the tri-cities Baytown was founded upon)

The Pelly Rats, the gang of "blue" in Baytown near Horace Mann and well, around Sterling, was named because the residents in Pelly were called the Pelly Rats. Why? No one has ANY FUCKING CLUE.

The Fred Hartman Bridge was named after the guy who founded the Baytown Sun. Lets all yawn now. I mean, if I was going to name the bridge anything, I'd name it the "Don't come over this bridge cause I'm a piece of shit town" Bridge.

With all of this said and done, the next thing I'm going to say will shock all of you: I will fight for Baytown if Clear Lake decides to invade. Here's a warning to Clear Lake: You might have the better cars, but we fucking make the gas that goes in them.

Let me remind all of you that I was born in Brooklyn, New York, on July 19, 1986, at Brooklyn Memorial, in Kings County (Brooklyn), New York, close by to Ebbets Field of the (Brooklyn) Dodgers.

Here's one thing to think about. If Baytown never existed, where would we all be? I mean, we all hate it so much, but think where you are now. If you have a girlfriend or boyfriend, think of how much they mean to you and how you found each other....in Baytown. If you had a bad experience with someone, think about how it probably happened in...Baytown. If you regreted doing something (which you shouldn't, thanks Sharon for the advice), you most likely regret...being a Baytownian, because that's the source of all your problems. Think of the marvelous fun times in...Baytown.

Think about how much you hate Baytown, and then think about this. If there wasn't a Baytown, like, lets say, there just wasn't any land, and Exxon was this huge island with a bridge connecting it, I'd be a prep right now, because I'd live in Clear Lake. Actually, that's a lie. If Exxon was on an island, that'd mean my father's company wouldn't exist, and I'd still be in New York.

If I was still in New York, would you be reading this? No, and even if there was a slight chance - I wouldn't talk about...Baytown.

Think of how in 1998, I created The Warzone, a newspaper, in...Baytown.

-Father-